Don't Let Your Mum Read This

This Sunday, 10 May 2020 it is Mother's Day. That's going to take a little bit of preparations this year, no last minute dash to the shop. Which is actually so much better.

Firstly, what's this Mother's Day all about?  It is not a historical or spiritual festival. Some people say it is a pure economical invention making people buy presents which they otherwise wouldn't buy.
So I did a bit of research.

History of Mothering Sunday

Like many traditions and festivities, Mothering Sunday began with a religious purpose. Held on the fourth Sunday in Lent, exactly three weeks before Easter Sunday, it was a originally a day to honour and give thanks to the Virgin Mary, also known as Mother Mary. Such celebrations required people to visit their 'mother' church - the main church or cathedral in a family's area. The spread of Christianity throughout Europe in the 16th century increased the celebrations and firmly put Mothering Sunday on the calendar. It was believed to be essential for people to return to their home 'mother' church to make it a true family honoured occasion. The gatherings reunited families and gave children who worked as domestic servants, or as apprentices away from home (from as early as ten years old), the opportunity to have the day off to join their family and see their mother.

Imagine, you could be somewhere working as servant right now! And once and awhile, on Mothering Sunday you could visit your church and see your mother... I am quite happy times have changed since then.

When we think of mothers, it is important to remember that it is not necessarily the woman who gave birth to you.  For me, a mother is someone who is there for you no matter what. Who looks after you but also where you feel you can cry and laugh and be absolutely yourself without having to pretend anything. Who still believes in you even if you have done a major stuff up. Who you can ask questions you do not dare to ask elsewhere.

Some people have blended families and they have several Mums, others don't live with their birth mum but with another family member like a Grand parent or a sister or two Dads. They are still your Mum, because they do the job of a Mum, no matter who gave birth to you.

Who ever has taken on the role of Mum in your life, I believe they need to be celebrated. And of course you could celebrate your Mum everyday, but in reality, does that happen? I certainly didn't celebrate my Mum enough. So I am very happy that there is a special day in the year where we make Mum our Very Special Person and spoil her.

Presents, in my eyes, are optional. Cards are non negotiable. There's no way around it, you have to make your Mum a card.

Here are some ideas to get you started.

Your card is not complete until you have written something in it. What a beautiful occasion to write a poem.

Reminder: A poem is writing where the words and rhythms dance together on the paper.

It doesn't have to rhyme, but if you like rhyming go for it. But rather than getting stuck on 'what writes with purple?', read you poem out loud to yourself and listen if it dances. 

You have to watch out that your poem doesn't become sugary and sickly sweet. There are already too many poems like that in the world, try to be more original. A great way to avoid too much sugar is to think of  something your Mum does that makes you happy: reading you a story, tucking you into bed, baking you cookies. When I grew up, one of my favourite moments with my Mum was when she took me to the library every Thursday afternoon.

This becomes the title of you poem. So in my case it would be:

When Mama takes me to the library

Next, jot down some things you think of when you do your favourite thing with your Mum. Think of your senses: what do you hear, smell, see or touch during this time?

Don't overthink it, just write down whatever comes up in you. Keep it random.

Your next step is to write these ideas in sentences. You can add things if you like.

This happened to my Random Ideas:

Our footsteps on the pavement, you take one step when I take two.

When we come outside it is dark.

I am holding your warm hand.

You laugh when I skip down the steps.

We walk into another world.

You carry a heavy bag filled with books.

The smell of books is so comforting.

I get to use my special library card.

After playing around with the order, I adjusted the words a little so it would flow better. It became:

When You Take Me to the Library

The sound of our footsteps on the pavement,

you take one step when I take two.

your warm hand is holding mine 

while your other hand carries the heavy bag

You laugh when I skip down the steps.

We walk into another world.

I played around with the smell of books, the darkness and my library card, but somehow it didn't really add anything to my poem, it felt enough like it was, so I ditched these lines.

Top Writing Tip: sometimes your writing is great not because of what you wrote, but what you chose to delete.

To finish off your poem, think what feeling the activity gives you. I had to think hard about how to describe that feeling, I know what I felt, but to find the right words takes time and effort.

Eventually I decided to keep it strong and simple: I feel safe and warm. I added this to my poem at the end.

Then I realised: I could use the darkness now effectively. So my last two sentences became:

I feel safe and warm with you here
Even when it is dark outside.

Follow my steps. You don't have to add the very last sentence, just finish with your feeling. I only did it because it looked right. Play with your poem, put it down, walk away, come back to it and try again. At some time, it will fall into place. Write it as beautiful as you can in your card and hide it until Sunday.

In tomorrow's blog post, there will be more ideas about celebrating Mum-Without-Shops, but start with your card and poem today. 

If you are stuck with your poem, email or video call me. James and I did his poem in Bubble Gum today and Jennie has a really nice poem going her way- don't tell!